After a couple of days, I feel kinda insane already. Outburst of negative emotions in the blog will always make situations worse, I surely don't know why but THIS IS ME. I know there is a droplet of hope somewhere in this world. Increasing powerlessness over others is such a struggle.
It is difficult to understand a person who has a very awkward personality because you can always judge without enlightenment.
It is difficult to accept a very different person in a similar society as you are in.
It is difficult to acknowledge an unagreeable idealism of another person.
Where are the metaphysical considerations of social welfare and guidance?
What are the genuine assurances of belief and ultimate veracities?
I don't want to think about the treachery of 2008 anymore. It has been the worst year of my life. After all, Horses receive the worst luck in the year of the Rat, according to chinese astrologers.
A new year is a new beginning. Let 2009 roll like a wheel to eternity. Let 2008 rot and decompose to the atomic level.
I am very wounded at the core. LOVE AND FRIENDSHIP are the 2 things I want to know. As what I said earlier, I know I am anxious most of the time, Psychologists call this disorder as the "Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD)". This is simply my personal judgement not a professional psychological diagnosis. So, should I say that I have an abnormal personality just because of anxiety? I believe so.
By next year, I will be consulting a psychology teacher about this.
No matter what happens, hope in our hearts holds the righteous pathway to God.
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